5 Jobs You Had No Idea Existed

Your job sucks. But there is hope yet, friends. I've compiled this list of only 5 of many jobs available that you probably had no idea even existed. Remember, it's never too late to change careers, even if you're in your late 20's.

1. Pain Guru - Sure, we all know about Love Gurus, but were you aware of Pain Gurus? Of course not. Pain Gurus are the spiritual men and women who aggravate the senses to the point of extreme discomfort. Often the procedure is mistaken for what is commonly called "torture," but those submitted to the Pain Guru's methods are there under their own accord. In fact, the procedure is often expensive and can only be afforded by the most affluent and masochistic. A typical Pain Guru session, or "Bludgeoning" consists of repeated ear flicking, hand stapling, forced tooth grinding, and excessive name calling.



2. Frowner- As the name entails, the Frowner is someone whose sole responsibility is to frown. Frowners are often employed "under the radar" by mourners and sympathists everywhere. Perhaps the best known Frowner, Arnold Hanfrey took the world by storm as his frowns produced such emotions on onlookers that they often wept. His face was used in advertising, most notably in the successful 1988 campaign for Frowny's Pizza. Who could forget that hypnotic jingle: Frown-y's Piz-za, It's not-bad-or-good.?
   
   
3. Sky Taster - Not to be confused with Sky-Food Tester, the Sky Taster is responsible for assuring the most crisp and flavorful atmospheres for breathing consumption by his client. Sky Tasting is more often than not a freelance venture, though there are a few small Sky Tasting organizations-- most notably Tas-Tee-Air, who releases a yearly list of the Top 5 Delicious U.S. Skies. These places have included Eugene, Oregon; Key West, Florida; Hershey, Pennsylvania; and Strawberries-n-Cream, New Mexico.



4. Spuckman- A Spuckman is responsible for designing stucco patterns and textures. Famous Spuckmen have included Barry Manilow, Quentin Tarantino, Billy Ocean, and Bebe Neuwirth.



5. Photographer- Believe it or not, some people are actually paid to take photographs of other people and/or things.

Stick around, readers, more awesome lists and things to come!